Evolutionary MISMATCH is everywhere – work, academia, retirement

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld.  In today’s show, we discuss the following listener questions about evolutionary mismatch at work, academia, and retirement.

 

1. I was on straight energy conservation mode for years at work. Putting in minimum effort and getting poor performance reviews. I hated it but for the life of me I couldn’t figure out how to get my motivation on board. Then I listened to you for years and over time bits of the pieces of the puzzle started coming together. Ultimately, I realized what I really wanted was the feeling of being productively occupied. To feel productively occupied though my brain needed to feel that it was generating real value in the world and get feedback that the value generated was indeed “real”. That is all to say I could never put a finger on the impact of my efforts in my corporate job. Does this mean the corporate world just isn’t for me? Or do I just need to zero in on what I directly impact in my current position and focus on that? Have you ever heard of people getting their mind/ motivation on board after 8 years of something?

2. I am a Master’s student in Psychology based in Germany, and I am planning to write my thesis on the topic of evolutionary mismatch in the workplace. My aim is to measure this mismatch using a questionnaire and then correlate it with hypothesized outcomes such as job satisfaction and mental health. I believe there may be connections between mismatch and phenomena such as burnout, as well as job satisfaction. This could potentially explain why some individuals prefer to work in small startups despite the objective drawbacks. However, I am encountering resistance from my professors, as they argue that the concept of “mismatch” is subjective and cannot be empirically measured, given that we cannot accurately determine the working conditions during the hunter-gatherer era. As such, they suggest that my thesis could be dismissed as a “just-so” story. I would greatly appreciate any advice on how to address this issue in my thesis.

3. Can you discuss the lack of goals once one is an empty nester? I am 61 and have many hobbies, i have volunteered so much I am having trouble finding anything that I can get excited about. I was a SAH mom and no grandchildren yet but not really interested in the grandchildren daycare duties if and when they present themselves. Post pandemic everything has slowed way down and it feels like reinventing the wheel for the hundredth time. My husband is still working for about 1 more year but we don’t have many common interests. I am coming off of 7 years of being the power of attorney and executor for my aunt who had dementia and passed then subsequently handling the estate with many beneficiaries who are not interested in any kind of support or help so thank goodness I am almost finished with those nearly full time complicated estate duties which utilized my skills well but was very stressful. Now I am just tired of all the working for free but advancing to nowhere. I am very self motivated but wow, the future looks very mundane. Can you suggest some action steps to get going again?

Teasers [0:00]

Intro  [0:42]

Question #1 [1:51]

Answer #1: [3:08]

Question #2: [37:20]

Answer #2: [38:30]

Question #3  [48:55]

Answer #3:  [50:10]

Wrapping up: [1:03:54]

Outro:  [1:05:13]

 

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Web: http://www.beatyourgenes.org

Doug Lisle, PhD http://www.esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld, DC http://www.fastingescape.com

Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use

 

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337: I’m RICH but I DIDN’T EARN it – Can I EVER be HAPPY? Should I be CONCERNED about all the NEGATIVITY in the news?

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld. 

Question 1: How do I get back to being happy with so much violence and negativity swirling around in the news and in the world? No matter what has been going on in my life, I have always tended to be happy and optimistic, but recently it feels like everything seems pretty bleak in the world and it is bringing me down. I truly don’t have any reason to be unhappy- I am part of a magic 10% marriage, I have a good job and great friends and make good money, and truly, want for nothing, but I am fighting feeling sad and anxious about everything going on around me even though I don’t watch the news and am not on social media.

Question 2: Dear Dr. Lisle, I’m a 25 year old woman and I am unmotivated, have no career, no passions or purpose in life because my family is extremely rich. I am set to inherit a ton of money (tens of millions of dollars) from my parents, so basically I am set for life if I do absolutely nothing for the rest of my life. I didn’t go to college because I knew I was going to inherit all this money and I didn’t think it was worth it. Now, I literally don’t know what to do with my life. Other people need to work to live. I have more money than they will ever make in their lifetime and I didn’t even do anything to earn it. My parents tell me to do whatever I want because I’ll be rich anyway. I’m embarrassed to date because I have no interesting personality characteristics; I have no career, I’m unmotivated, no passions, no purpose in life. I’m just a spoiled rich girl who inherited daddy’s money, who’s going to love me for who I am? How am I going to spend the next 50 years of my life? I feel unmotivated to do anything because I’m already rich but then I feel guilty for having nothing to offer to the world. What should I do?

 

Intro [0:00]

Question #1: [0:55]

Dr. Lisle answers: [1:44]

A threshold has been reached [41:53]

Understand economics [42:10]

Question #2: [46:52]

Dr. Lisle answers: [47:55]

Outro [1:08:40]

 

Follow us:

YouTube: @beatyourgenes

X: @beatyourgenes

Insta: @Beatyourgenespodcast

Web: http://www.beatyourgenes.org

Doug Lisle, PhD http://www.esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld, DC http://www.fastingescape.com

Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use

 

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333: Great marriage but romance FADING? How do our traits OVERLAP? Are PSYCH meds EVER worth it?

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld.  In Today’s show, Dr. Lisle discusses the overlap of Big Five traits in normal human behavior and how to understand the conceptual framework rather than getting bogged down in formulaic thinking.  Our next question has to do with anti-anxiety medications and whether they are ever worth taking.  Then we wrap things with a question about being in a great marriage to a best friend but whose romance is fading.

 1. The big five traits overlap way too much! for ex is someone nice because they are agreeable or because they are extremely conscientious and believe it is the right way to behave or are they just intelligent enough to understand that being nice is an advantageous strategy to get people to cooperate with them? any new developments in the field of personality?

2. Are there any situations or personality types where you believe taking anti-anxiety medications would be a good choice? Versus just seeing a good anxiety therapist like Dr. Laura Bruce who most likely isn’t covered by their insurance anyway? For example, I am high in neuroticism, also high in conscientiousness.. but also impulsive.. and I’m currently working a high pressure job to pay off a low interest loan. But the job is stressful (I came into it and discovered they were operating at a -160k deficit, I’m being transparent with the board but we are still operating at a big deficit and might need to close within a year or two).. and my friend keeps telling me to get some anti-anxiety meds. In this case, if I *need* to do something like work a stressful job for a year, should anti-anxiety meds still be off the table? Why or why not?

3. What does a position of power with respect to marriage look like. For me the biggest threat to leaving a marriage is loneliness. I’m not a super out going guy and I fear that growing old without her companionship will be very depressing. My wife is my best friend and the few friends I do have are couple friends we both share. My issue is that the sexual romance side of it is fading. We both have decent paying jobs so financially we could comfortably figure it out if we did decide on splitting. I’m also not worried about the one child we have together we are both on the same page that our job is just to give him a good life experience. The main issue is we are best friends and I understand that is partly because our lives are literally interdependent. Separating may server that bond.

 

Follow us:

YT: @beatyourgenes

X: @beatyourgenes

Insta: @Beatyourgenespodcast

Web: http://www.beatyourgenes.org

Doug Lisle, PhD http://www.esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld, DC http://www.fastingescape.com

Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use

 

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