psychology – Beat Your Genes

347: Do husbands just want sex and food? Are good looking people the only ones that can find love?

December 11, 2024 by Nate

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01:08:44

347: Do husbands just want sex and food? Are good looking people the only ones that can find love?

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Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld. In today’s show, Dr. Lisle discusses our first question in which a wife feels like she’s sometimes just being used for sex and food. Question #2 is from a listener wondering if some people are just doomed to never find love.

[0:00] Teasers and Intro

[1:21] Question 1: Wife admires husband but sometimes feels like all he wants is sex and hot meal

[36:29] Question 2: Are some people (in the middle of bell curve) not able to find romantic love?

1. I’ve heard you say that in a good relationship, the man finds the woman attractive while the woman admires the man’s character. This describes my marriage. My husband and I have been together for 30 years. He still wants sex a lot, and I admire his work ethic and dedication as a father. The problem is, I can’t help but feel I’m being “used.” I often feel like all he wants from me is sex and a hot meal. He seems to pour 99% of his energy into his job and career advancement, leaving my emotional needs completely neglected. He works long hours, rarely has time for me, and doesn’t share in parenting duties. He’s constantly stressed and often snaps at me when he’s in a bad mood. When I get upset, he always says he didn’t mean it and that he only lashed out because he was at his limit. I know I can’t change who he is, and I can’t change my own feelings about his attitude. What can I do to improve our situation?

2. Are some people, who are otherwise normal or middle of the bell curve, just not meant to ever find romantic love? If they are reasonably attractive, intelligent, and have good character is it possible for them to still end alone? What would cause this? Is there any truth to the saying that love comes when you are not looking or when you least expect it?

Web: http://www.beatyourgenes.org

Doug Lisle, PhD http://www.esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld, DC http://www.fastingescape.com

Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use

E346: Applied Evolutionary Psychology, Young woman dating wealthy man, Dietary disagreement in raising child, Women may feel secure when mate is right more often

November 29, 2024 by Nate

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01:09:25

E346: Applied Evolutionary Psychology, Young woman dating wealthy man, Dietary disagreement in raising child, Women may feel secure when mate is right more often

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Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld. In today’s show, Dr. Lisle discusses the concept of Beating Your Genes and applying evolutionary psychology as a therapist, and then he answers listener questions on dating, dietary disagreement, and mutual decision making in relationships.

[0:00] Teasers and Intro

[1:56] Applying evolutionary psychology in a therapy practice

[25:05] Beating your Genes

[28:05] Young woman dating a wealthy man but feeling guilty from all of the gifts

[50:34] Husband and Vegan Wife have a great relationship but there is strain around what food to feed their baby

[59:10] Women may feel more secure with their mate when he’s right 70% of the time

1. Three months ago, I started dating a very rich man. I am not at all a gold digger and I was not looking for a man at all when I met him. He treats me well and spoils me. However, I feel guilty accepting his gifts and money and not giving him anything in return. I’m 25 years old and a student. For my birthday he bought me thousands of dollars worth of jewelry while I bought him a tie. I felt so bad for not being able to buy him something more expensive. I feel like our relationship is unbalanced and feel guilty every time he spends money on me. I know lots of girls who would love to be in my situation and they definitely wouldn’t feel guilty. What’s wrong with me? How can I stop feeling guilty and just enjoy my time with him?

2. My husband and I are in a magic 10% relationship and we have a one year old baby. I am plant based vegan and he is not. I never thought this would be a problem before we had kids but now it’s putting a huge strain on our relationship. I’m the one who does the most child rearing and so our baby started eating 100% whole foods plant based like me. My husband however thinks that veganism is not healthy for babies so he insists on giving her eggs, meat etc for her brain development. Maybe I have OCD when it comes to healthy eating but I am in such emotional pain when I see him feeding the baby meat. We fight all the time over this and if we continue like this we will end up divorced, which I don’t want to happen because I know I was so in love with him before we had a baby. What should I do? How can I save my marriage?

3. When it comes to females feeling more secure when their males make better decisions 70% of the time – does this apply to all decisions? Like: raising children, cooking, the finances, car repair, household operations, cleaning, travel planning, etc? Are males most comfortable when their female partners make better decisions than them 30% of the time? What about work environments? Should females feel their male bosses and peers make better decisions than them 70% of the time? If so, how can females ever be leaders in the workplace?

Web: http://www.beatyourgenes.org

Doug Lisle, PhD http://www.esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld, DC http://www.fastingescape.com

Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use

345: Psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD, weights in on the US Election… What is Morality?

November 14, 2024 by Nate

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01:08:53

345: Psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD, weights in on the US Election… What is Morality?

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Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld. In today’s show, Dr. Lisle discusses the US Presidential Election and what to consider if you are distraught or if you are celebrating the results of President Trump being elected. Also, Dr. Lisle discusses the concept of morality – what is it? Is it innate? Is it taught?

1. Dr. Lisle weighs in on what to consider about the US Presidential election

2. If morality requires us to act against our psychology, which is impossible, does morality exist?

Teasers [0:00]

Intro [1:38]

Opening discussion [3:08]

Dr. Lisle on whether your candidate won or lost: [4:15]

You have specific relationships with individuals not government [7:52]

An example of an oil wild-catter [13:07]

The Group Trap [21:10]

Opportunity and Adversity [33:41]

Beating your genes [36:19]

Some wins and some losses for your tribal psychology [43:04]

Question # 2: What is morality? [48:13]

Individual differences that are species-specific [56:28]

In group/Out group behavior [1:02:00]

Morality of the species is magnificent [1:06]: 20

Life goes on, look for opportunity [1:07:38]

Outro: [1:08:35]

YouTube: @beatyourgenes

X: @beatyourgenes

Insta: @Beatyourgenespodcast

Web: http://www.beatyourgenes.org

Doug Lisle, PhD http://www.esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld, DC http://www.fastingescape.com

Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use